loves and misses

The first time I saw G was at church. He was wearing this weird greeny tweedy vest (thrift store find probably) and I didn't care for that much, and the fact that I saw past that and his "cool" horn rimmed glasses said something. At least to me.

I didn't actually exchange any words with him until right before Christmas break. I was a sophomore at BYU and he was a senior living just on the other side of the pool (which I NEVER swam in the entire time I lived there - too small, too odd colorish, too open to the public.. unlike the DT pool which oddly enough I DID swim in. Once. Weird.). Anyway, his apartment was cool. I knew he was in a band, I knew I was oddly attracted to his younger skinny roommate, and I thought they were all related. You LeSueurs.... But he and his roommate came over late one night, right before Christmas break, randomly, and ended up hanging out with me for a while. I was up writing music actually (former life) and so I talked with his roommate about music and stuff and G just sat there. When they left, I thought he was bored. He barely said a word. There was just so something about him though.

Turns out he was fascinated that I was up writing lyrics and had a guitar. I think that's why he started dating me, really.

The first time he called me he said, "I don't know if you know who I am but..." Uh duh, I'v been stalking you for like 3 months now. I would tell my mom on the phone, "George's truck just drove by." I would leave French stategically to see him walking home. Eventually we were walking home together. Well, I was walking. He was skateboard riding.

He prayed for bad weather so I would come home early from a weekend trip to Aspen. Our first kiss waited for me to get back. Early.

He told me he loved me for the first time on our trampoline.

He went off to Washington DC to see Radiohead right before he told me he wanted to marry me. A last single guy trip.

His band was Sunfall Festival. And they were pretty darn good. I have to say I loved watching him up on stage.

I miss that now.

G is in Utah this weekend. And he will be up on a stage with Paul Jacobsen and his BFF Scott. And I won't get to see it. Maybe I will pull out some old SFF video tapes and watch those.




I miss you. Come home safe.