Dearest Friends & Family in Utah

(beautiful soft elevator music playing, birds chirping...)

Dear Persons,
We are enjoying the northwest immensely. We have fun in the snow, just as we did in the shadows of the Wasatch. We love the sun, just as we did in Happy Valley. We have a Temple, and churches. We love the trees and the lakes. We are so happy with our new lives here in this beautiful corner of America.....

(sudden record scratch)

HOWEVER, we are also suffering! When we are hungry and depressed there is nothing to comfort us. When we are longing for something and look to our cupboards - they are bare. We have called and searched online - but to no avail.

WE CAN NOT GET
GRANDMA SYCAMORE'S HOMEMAID BREAD.

We are suffering most desperately. Our comfort food of choice no longer offers comfort but elusiveness and a cold darkness because it is only for those who remained in the center of the country. We have only black holes inside our souls.

Look how happy this little girl is with her 2 loaves of fresh baked, soft, doughy goodness that also freezes exceptionally well and tastes fresh after it thaws.

SHE MOCKS OUR PAIN!

So, you, our dearest, sweetest, most faithful friends of the Greatest Snow on Earth State (although ours is pretty good as well), could you be so kind as to

SEND BREAD!



Yours Affectionately,
the brunt brood